Mighty Mango #6
If it snows in May, is it the last snow of the year or the first snow of the year?
It's a stupid question. But it's a stupid storm. Looking outside without consulting a calendar would make you think it was December, just before New Year's. But it's May 23rd, and it snowed last night.
This is not a normal thing in Nebraska. By May, it's usually warming up and farmers have planted their crops already. Well, that last part is true still: crops have been planted. And this freak storm that came out of nowhere to surprise every weatherman, almanac, and armchair forecaster is going to kill every single one of them.
There will not be much of a harvest this year. That which has already sprouted will die under the thick layer of powdery white; that which hasn't will never sprout. Some farms will survive this. The rich, corporate farms; the huge farms with huge insurance policies. But the "family farm," always romanticized even as people buy bread from Wal-Mart, is not going to survive.
Anyone left in Nebraska living in a farmhouse is very cold today. They've taken the insulation down and put the big blankets into storage; no one has their winter clothes handy. It's drafty, and cold, and the kids still need to get to school. No one has their snow tires on, and so there are going to be car accidents this morning. This snow is going to be a death sentence for more than just soybean crops.
Omaha's homeless population will be hit worst of all. Hundreds of them froze to death in their sleep, or before they could get warm again. Hypothermia is going to hit the rest, or already has. When you don't have a home, there's nowhere to keep the winter clothes when summer comes--so to avoid heat stroke, most of them just throw them away. There's always more rags to be picked up from dumps, but this is such short notice many of them won't make it. Dead Vietnam vets are littering the worst parts of town, victims of a midyear My Lai, with the cold front cast in the role of the ruthless conqueror.
It will melt. Soon. And for some, this will be nothing but a convenient excuse to throw snowballs and take goofy pictures. In five years, ten years, twenty years, this will be a yarn told around cozy fireplaces at family Christmas gatherings--remember the time it snowed this much, but in May? And everyone will laugh a little bit, and Grandpa will fall asleep in his chair, and someone will suggest playing Monopoly. The top hat is still missing, at least from the game.
Everything will be fine then.
It's a stupid question. But it's a stupid storm. Looking outside without consulting a calendar would make you think it was December, just before New Year's. But it's May 23rd, and it snowed last night.
This is not a normal thing in Nebraska. By May, it's usually warming up and farmers have planted their crops already. Well, that last part is true still: crops have been planted. And this freak storm that came out of nowhere to surprise every weatherman, almanac, and armchair forecaster is going to kill every single one of them.
There will not be much of a harvest this year. That which has already sprouted will die under the thick layer of powdery white; that which hasn't will never sprout. Some farms will survive this. The rich, corporate farms; the huge farms with huge insurance policies. But the "family farm," always romanticized even as people buy bread from Wal-Mart, is not going to survive.
Anyone left in Nebraska living in a farmhouse is very cold today. They've taken the insulation down and put the big blankets into storage; no one has their winter clothes handy. It's drafty, and cold, and the kids still need to get to school. No one has their snow tires on, and so there are going to be car accidents this morning. This snow is going to be a death sentence for more than just soybean crops.
Omaha's homeless population will be hit worst of all. Hundreds of them froze to death in their sleep, or before they could get warm again. Hypothermia is going to hit the rest, or already has. When you don't have a home, there's nowhere to keep the winter clothes when summer comes--so to avoid heat stroke, most of them just throw them away. There's always more rags to be picked up from dumps, but this is such short notice many of them won't make it. Dead Vietnam vets are littering the worst parts of town, victims of a midyear My Lai, with the cold front cast in the role of the ruthless conqueror.
It will melt. Soon. And for some, this will be nothing but a convenient excuse to throw snowballs and take goofy pictures. In five years, ten years, twenty years, this will be a yarn told around cozy fireplaces at family Christmas gatherings--remember the time it snowed this much, but in May? And everyone will laugh a little bit, and Grandpa will fall asleep in his chair, and someone will suggest playing Monopoly. The top hat is still missing, at least from the game.
Everything will be fine then.
posted by Anonymous at 10:07 AM
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