Benign Boysenberry #2
The Question
him.. in bed, in the dark…“What would you say if I asked you to marry me?”
me: thinking, not saying… ‘ohmygod, isthishowitisgoingtohappen?’,
my mind races with images of our past:
meeting in high school
Calc 2
He had a cute butt and called the teacher a moron
He was right
our reuinion a few years later
“do you remember me” his first words after all those years
how could I forget YOU, I wanted to scream… “of course” I said.
My friends teased me because I couldn’t forget him
I compared all other guys to him, none passed the test
endless trips to visit him
endless missing him between trips
packing all my stuff in a Ford Escort
goodbye to friends and family
driving across the Midwest to live with my love
what an adventure
our sweet and cheap apartment in Denver
with the carpet in the bathroom
two cats waiting impatiently for us to return
me, out loud: ”why, are you going to ask me?”
SILENCE SILENCE SILENCE SILENCE
The silence of a strange house, his friend David’s parent’s house in Salt Lake City
A silence only broken by strange house noises, mysterious bangs and pops…
recollections of the trip we are on now:
The guy who went nuts at the McDonalds
Helpless wife and kids in pjs and diapers
Watch their husband/father rant about the CIA and McD’s management
All we wanted was an egg McMuffin,
That will teach us to go inside to eat….
White Sands, more hot and dry than I’d ever been
Dry heat my ass 120 degrees is cooking temperature…
Laughing in the dark of our Grand Canyon hotel,
the one without A/C, July 4th weekend.
Damm—that was good sex, wow was it sweaty
Temple Square, Salt Lake City after dark with the lights on
the Mormon Mecca in all her glory – was that what prompted this?
What if he’s just in some Mormon-trance and wants to back out…
shit… it’s taking him too long….
Him: breaking the silence, “if I did ask you, would that freak you out?
With a hint of worry in his voice
He’s too sweet to worry this much, he must really looooove me… wow.
How could I possibly deserve this love?
silence, silence, silence,
what do I say???…
I think about our future…
He’s fun in and out of bed
He’s smart, funny and we have the same values
Sure, he’s kind of a geek but I’m no prom queen
And, I do love him
I’ve loved him since I met him
I loved him before I met him
I moved to Denver for him
I’d move to the Moon for him
Shit, what will I say if he asks?
“No” will break his heart, and mine
“YES” feels right, seems right… is it?
Me: out loud “No, I won’t get freaked out if you ask me”
Silence – that heavy silence, filled only with breathing in the still air of the guest room.
Which freaks me out
is he going to ask or not?
what if he doesn’t, I can’t ask him, can I ask him, or would that be weird?
I don’t see myself as a bride
Princess for a day
With a puffy white dress and 74 bridesmaids?
Rehearsal dinners and wedding cakes,
ring bearers and “colors”…aargh..
We have no money and neither do our moms
Could we elope?
Are we too young?
We don’t have good jobs or college degrees?
Will we be good parents?
Will our children have hooves?
Finally he speaks, his voice cracks, he speaks fast – like he wants to get it all out at once: “I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you, will you marry me?”
I cry,
I’m a dope and cry when I’m happy
I answer “of course I’ll marry you”
We make love quietly
In the squeaky guest bed
The first people we tell in the morning are David’s parents
When we get up early to drive home to Denver.
They are Japanese and are happy for us
David’s 19 and doesn’t get it
The only thing he loves is his tricked-out Ford Escort, and antelope – don’t ask…
In the car on the way home
I look at him and realize we’ll be together forever
And that’s the way it should be.
When we get home, we call friends and family
We pick out a ring and have a formal proposal in a park with a ring and wine
But the one that counts
Was in Salt Lake
Under the covers of David’s parent’s guest bed
He and I became “we”
And I knew I’d never be a child again
him.. in bed, in the dark…“What would you say if I asked you to marry me?”
me: thinking, not saying… ‘ohmygod, isthishowitisgoingtohappen?’,
my mind races with images of our past:
meeting in high school
Calc 2
He had a cute butt and called the teacher a moron
He was right
our reuinion a few years later
“do you remember me” his first words after all those years
how could I forget YOU, I wanted to scream… “of course” I said.
My friends teased me because I couldn’t forget him
I compared all other guys to him, none passed the test
endless trips to visit him
endless missing him between trips
packing all my stuff in a Ford Escort
goodbye to friends and family
driving across the Midwest to live with my love
what an adventure
our sweet and cheap apartment in Denver
with the carpet in the bathroom
two cats waiting impatiently for us to return
me, out loud: ”why, are you going to ask me?”
SILENCE SILENCE SILENCE SILENCE
The silence of a strange house, his friend David’s parent’s house in Salt Lake City
A silence only broken by strange house noises, mysterious bangs and pops…
recollections of the trip we are on now:
The guy who went nuts at the McDonalds
Helpless wife and kids in pjs and diapers
Watch their husband/father rant about the CIA and McD’s management
All we wanted was an egg McMuffin,
That will teach us to go inside to eat….
White Sands, more hot and dry than I’d ever been
Dry heat my ass 120 degrees is cooking temperature…
Laughing in the dark of our Grand Canyon hotel,
the one without A/C, July 4th weekend.
Damm—that was good sex, wow was it sweaty
Temple Square, Salt Lake City after dark with the lights on
the Mormon Mecca in all her glory – was that what prompted this?
What if he’s just in some Mormon-trance and wants to back out…
shit… it’s taking him too long….
Him: breaking the silence, “if I did ask you, would that freak you out?
With a hint of worry in his voice
He’s too sweet to worry this much, he must really looooove me… wow.
How could I possibly deserve this love?
silence, silence, silence,
what do I say???…
I think about our future…
He’s fun in and out of bed
He’s smart, funny and we have the same values
Sure, he’s kind of a geek but I’m no prom queen
And, I do love him
I’ve loved him since I met him
I loved him before I met him
I moved to Denver for him
I’d move to the Moon for him
Shit, what will I say if he asks?
“No” will break his heart, and mine
“YES” feels right, seems right… is it?
Me: out loud “No, I won’t get freaked out if you ask me”
Silence – that heavy silence, filled only with breathing in the still air of the guest room.
Which freaks me out
is he going to ask or not?
what if he doesn’t, I can’t ask him, can I ask him, or would that be weird?
I don’t see myself as a bride
Princess for a day
With a puffy white dress and 74 bridesmaids?
Rehearsal dinners and wedding cakes,
ring bearers and “colors”…aargh..
We have no money and neither do our moms
Could we elope?
Are we too young?
We don’t have good jobs or college degrees?
Will we be good parents?
Will our children have hooves?
Finally he speaks, his voice cracks, he speaks fast – like he wants to get it all out at once: “I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you, will you marry me?”
I cry,
I’m a dope and cry when I’m happy
I answer “of course I’ll marry you”
We make love quietly
In the squeaky guest bed
The first people we tell in the morning are David’s parents
When we get up early to drive home to Denver.
They are Japanese and are happy for us
David’s 19 and doesn’t get it
The only thing he loves is his tricked-out Ford Escort, and antelope – don’t ask…
In the car on the way home
I look at him and realize we’ll be together forever
And that’s the way it should be.
When we get home, we call friends and family
We pick out a ring and have a formal proposal in a park with a ring and wine
But the one that counts
Was in Salt Lake
Under the covers of David’s parent’s guest bed
He and I became “we”
And I knew I’d never be a child again
posted by Anonymous at 5:37 AM
1 Comments:
Wow, this is really good! Nice job!
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